"For the avoidance of doubt, there is no such thing as 'American English.' There is the English language, and there are mistakes." -Elizabeth Windsor
Ahhhh, English. One of the most confusing languages in the world. You'd think teaching English would be a cake-walk since I'm a native English speaker. But, alas, nothing in life is that simple. Textbooks in Thailand are written in the "Queen's English." Meaning, it's UK terminology.
There is no such thing as pound, mile, ounce, or Fahrenheit. These are nonsense terms, which are, clearly, made-up. Instead, we're working with kilogram, kilometer, liter, and Celsius.
Thailand tried to be different too when they made up "Kheed" as a measurement. Like, how am I supposed to teach something I've never heard of?
Not only are the students learning, but so am I. I mean, I haven't done conversions since high school Chemistry, and now I'm having to teach myself how the rest of the world measures things? Who in America decided to be different anyway? Why not make it easy and use the global standard for measurements, America?
Don't even get me started on spelling. Center / centre; litre / liter; meter / metre. Since when does "er" and "re" sound the same?
I cannot begin to tell you how many times I spell things wrong for the students then try and explain why I'm making mistakes. "Ummm, sorry kids. Americans made up their own spelling long ago, so I'm learning too."
Ahh, rubbish. My favorite.
Artifact?
WTF is a lorry?
For all the Americans out there, who are planning on teaching abroad, be prepared to learn "proper" English. American English, redneck, Yankee slang, hippie jargon, and ebonics aren't allowed.